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I decided to create this website because there were too many beer-sites that just had a bunch of amateurs grading the beers and they were all over the place. For example, one person would note how the head on the beer was awful and another person would say how great the head was on the same exact beer. First of all, was the beer designed to have a great head because higher alcoholic beers tend to have weaker heads and what glass was the beer poured in, how was the glass cleaned, was it nitrogen tapped or did the beer come in a bottle . There are so many factors that determine a beer and all its qualities so I decided to review these beers myself.  I will also allow others to leave their comments because the more people talk about the beer the more educated the consumer will be.

There are many factors that go into deciding what rating one should give to a certain beer. I have meticulously reviewed these beers according to what I feel is the proper way to review such beers.  Below is a list of the criteria I use to judge a particular beer.

  • Does the brewer’s description match what I am smelling, tasting, seeing, and feeling.
  • Does the beer itself match the generally accepted characteristics of the style and genre. (i.e., if the brewer says this is an hefeweizen, does it have the proper prerequisites of a hefeweizen or is the beer lacking wheat all together. I understand that brewer’s sometimes change the style of beer to suit there artistic visions and I respect that and grade accordingly to the description).
  • What are the characteristics of the beer; the ABV, IBU, SRM, sweetness, bitterness, tartness, sourness, etc. I check the head color, retention, lacing, etc.
  • I use a “beer clean” glass for every beer reviewed and try to match the glass with what the brewer recommends. I hand wash every glass with a beer-only sponge and use special soap that does not leave any chemicals or aromas behind.
  • I also look to see what the average cost is for the beer, depending on the State of course, to see if this beer is worth the money you’re going to have to fork up.
  • I grade bitterness and sweetness by taste not by the brewer’s ingredients because those numbers only tell you how much hops or malt is in the beer not what it will taste like.

I am a tough grader and below I have created a 100 point scale to determine the overall quality of a particular beer.

  • 96-100, GODS: Humans are truly blessed to receive these gifts from the Gods.
  • 90-95, PHARAOH: Brewed by fearful, passionate masters out of respect for the gift of barley.
  • 86-89, VIZIERS: Valuable reward from those brewers who obey the calling of the Gods.
  • 80-85, HIGH PRIEST: Sacrificed to the Gods on a daily basis but not worthy for religious holidays.
  • 75-79, SCRIBE: Drank to enjoy the gift of beer, but not to praise it.
  • 70-74, CRAFTSMAN: Mediocre representation, an insult if presented as a gift to the Pharaoh.
  • 60-69, PEASANT: When water will kill you, these beers are still better than death.
  • 00-59, RAT: Not worthy of human consumption, maybe not even animal consumption.